You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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