the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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