you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
