the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
