i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
