Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
