Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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