I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
