Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Randomize
