If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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