I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Randomize
