I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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