We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
