My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
