Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
