So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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