did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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