i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
