Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
