i think my tv is drunk
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
