This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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