If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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