okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Randomize
