ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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