i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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