i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize