My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
