Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
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