Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
