420 ftw
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize