Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
