So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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