I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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