You really coming over, don't trick.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
