Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize