is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
