I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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