Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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