Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
We just shotgunned beers for America
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
