i always forget guys have bellybuttons
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
