What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
