So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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