You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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