Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
