I think im going to throw up on grandma
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
