Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Randomize
