I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
