i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
This is classic penis vs brain.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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