1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Randomize