is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
